Bhai Gurdaas jee in one of his Kabit gave some wonderful thoughts that I would like to share with you all. Please ponder upon the following Kabit:
1. ਜਾਕੈ ਨਾਇਕਾ ਅਨੇਕ ਏਕ ਸੇ ਅਧਿਕ ਏਕ ॥
ਪੂਰਨ ਸੁਹਾਗ ਭਾਗ ਸਉਤੈ ਸਮ ਧਾਮ ਹੈ ॥
2. ਮਾਨਨ ਹੁਇ ਮਾਨ ਭੰਗ ਬਿਛੁਰ ਬਿਦੇਸ ਰਹੀ ॥
ਬਿਰਹ ਬਿਯੋਗ ਲਗ ਬਿਰਹਨੀ ਭਾਮ ਹੈ ॥
3. ਸਿਥਲ ਸਮਾਨ ਤ੍ਰੀਯਾ ਸਕੇ ਨ ਰਿਝਾਇ ਪ੍ਰਿਯ
ਦਯੋ ਹੈ ਦੁਹਾਗ ਵੈ ਦੁਹਾਗਨ ਸਕਾਮ ਹੈ ॥
4. ਲੋਚਨ, ਸ੍ਰਵਨ, ਜੀਹ ਕਰ ਅੰਗ ਅੰਗਹੀਨ ॥
ਫਰਿਸਯੋ ਨ ਪੇਖ੍ਯੋ ਸੁਨ੍ਯੋ ਮੇਰੋ ਕਹਾ ਨਾਮ ਹੈ ॥642॥
1) One who has many wives and each one of them is better than the other one and all of them consider the husband to be their own. Since they are with their husbands, they are called Suhaagans.
2) Some women are proud and for this reason they get separated from their husband. They can't give up their pride but they burn in the sorrow of the separation of their husband. They are called Birhani (Viyogan).
3) Then there is such woman who is lazy (thus does not maintain herself to look beautiful) and also very proud. Such women are totally forsaken by their husbands. They are called Duhaagans.
4) Then there is one like me who has never felt her husband through the eyes, ears, tongue or any other part of the body. I have never felt my husband, nor have seen or heard him. What name should be given to me? ਮੇਰੋ ਕਹਾ ਨਾਮ ਹੈ i.e. what is my name?
Good women who are with their husbands are called Suhaagans. Ones who are separated from their husbands are Viyogans. Ones who are forsaken by their husbands are called Duhaagans. What name would you give to such woman as described in the point 4. Bhai Sahib is saying that the first three kind of women are at least associated with their husbands. Even the Duhaagan is at least associated with her husband, even if it means that she is associated negatively but what about the one who has not seen her husband at all i.e. have not felt the husband at all?
According to this Vichaar, it seems like the Jeev who is totally devoid of Vaheguru i.e. one who has had no spiritual experience is the most unfortunate.
May Guru Sahib do Kirpa.